Superfamily: Saving Peter
by spidermanwife
Summary: Since he was five years old, tragedy has always managed to find Peter Parker. Now, the adopted son of Captain America and Iron Man, Peter is ready to branch out and start a new life with his love -Gwen Stacey. Then tragedy strikes, not for Spider-man but for Peter Parker; sending him spiraling out of control. How can anyone save you when the enemy is yourself?
1. Chapter 1: Hero

_**(Dear regular Followers, **_

_**If you are still patiently waiting for me to update my other stories, you need not fear. I am working on multiple stories but I promise I won't abandon any of them. I have recently found myself wrapped into the joyous insanity that is Superfamily (all because of a new found obsession with Robert Downey Jr.) and I just had to get an idea off my chest-which turned out to be longer than I expected. But this story isn't fluff-it's a tragedy. It's about loss. It's about losing yourself so completely that you just can't find a way back. Even if you aren't found of Superfamily, the character of Peter plays a dominant role and is worth a read if only for his struggles. This is completely separate from my other stories and will have no ties. Please review if you are a fan and not just a hater.)**_

"This was no random murder; Richard and Mary Parker were SHIELD agents. Both were renowned scientists for their studies in genetics. Whatever research the Parkers were working on-someone wanted." Fury had said.

For as long as he lived, Steve Rogers was sure he would never shake the image of Richard and Mary's bodies. Captain America was no stranger to the sight of dead bodies; during the war he saw his share of gruesome acts of violence. He regrettably knew just how many ways a body could be mangled-twisted into sickening angles that went against the very structure of the human body. Working with SHIELD only added to the list of heinous acts he was forced to witness. War never just stayed on the battle field; it stretched to home. This was a constant. Man may have developed scientifically since the 40's but as a species, they were stuck. Man will always find a way to destroy each other.

The bloody scene bothered him-lives that he hadn't been able to save will always weigh on him-but it was the positioning of the bodies that struck him. Richard and Mary lay side by side on their stomachs ,both killed by a fatal shot to the back of the head. But due to the multiple wounds on both bodies, it was apparent that prior to the shooting, they were brutally tortured. Mary had been stabbed in the stomach; scars marking her face and neck. Richard had been beaten and shot in the right knee cap. Steve imagined that in an attempt to force information from Richard, the captors had begun to torture Mary in front of him. Richard had probably made an attempt to save her and was shot in the knee as punishment. God knows how long the torture lasted but it was apparent that they died looking into the eyes of their lover. Even in death, Mary's large brown eyes continued to stare into her husband's pale blue eyes; they were holding hands-waiting for the inevitable blast of the gun that would end their lives. The pictures that aligned the walls and tables told the story of a couple very much in love and the picture of their death only seemed to confirm it.

"They had a son", Fury added. "Peter."

"Is he….?"

"He's alive. We found him in hiding upstairs but the boys terrified. He could use a hero right now."

In the child's room-within the closet-SHIELD agents had found a hidden room with a crawl space only big enough for a small child to enter. Sure enough, that is where five year old Peter had been hiding. Peter had bitten one of the agents who had made an attempt to grab him; they were still trying to coax him out when Steve arrived.

"Hi there, Peter", Steve said, crouching near the hole. It was dark in there but the closet light exposed a pair of brown eyes. At the sound of his voice the child seemed to shift a bit more to get a closer look at the costumed superhero. I'm Captain America. Steve politely introduced himself, although it was apparent-due to the Avengers themed bedroom- the child knew exactly who he was.

"Did you beat up the bad people?"

"You're safe now. You can come out."

"Where's mommy and daddy?"

A lump caught in Steve's throat and it took him a moment to swallow it. "Let's focus on getting you out of there, first." He gently said. Peter seemed hesitant. His eyes kept flickering to the Captain America Shield that Steve had set down. "Tell you what, sport. You come out of there and I'll let you hold the shield. "Peter's eyes lit up. "Really?" Steve nodded. " But daddy told me not to leave no matter what."

"Your dad just wanted to keep you safe until the bad guys were gone. But the good guys are here now."

"You're a superhero", Peter said. "Superheroes are the good guys."

"That's right, Sport. You can trust me."

After a moment of contemplation, Peter edged his way out of the compartment. When he was in full view, Steve could see his face was red from crying. Peter was small and skinny with stringy brown bangs that hung down his forehead. He intently watched as Peter began to gently trace his finger along the shield; tracing the outline of the star. Steve held it up for Peter because realistically the shield was much too heavy even for a normal adult-much more to a small child. Peter placed his hands on Steve's, playing up the illusion that he alone was holding it. The shield was so large that it completely eclipsed Peter and made it seem as if the shield had sprouted a tiny pair of legs. Steve couldn't help but chuckle.

And for a few minutes, Steve and Peter had managed to block out the cacophony of noise downstairs until the gravity of the situation finally set in. Watching Peter with the shield, an idea came to mind. "This shield will protect you from anything. All you got to do is hold it up in from of you. Yeah-just like that sport! Hey, we should test out its powers, don't you think?" Peter nodded excitedly. "Great", Steve smiled. "But in order for it to keep you save you gotta hold it up in front of you-like this." Steve demonstrated for the small child, placing the shield so it covered his face. "Can you do that, Peter?" Peter nodded.

Steve then proceeded to scoop Peter up with one arm while the other held the shield directly in front of Peter, shielding his view. Peter once again placed his small hands over Steve's. "Remember, the shield can't protect you if you try to look past it", Steve cautioned. "So no matter what you hear, keep it in front of you, okay?" The two of them made their way down stairs, walking directly into the mob of agents and police.

"You're doing great Peter! Just like a real superhero." Steve encouraged, effectively dosing any inspiration Peter had to peek at the scene. Together they side stepped past the agents. Past the blood. Past his parents bodies. They passed it all until they were out the front door. He hadn't been able to save the Parkers, but he had at least managed to spare their son from seeing their mangled bodies.

Once outside, bright lights and shrill noises greeted them. The sound of sirens filled the night air; lights painting everything red. Police managed the onlookers-a large great of people in pajamas-straining to get a better look at the crime scene. The energy significantly increased as the onlookers gawked at the legendary Captain America. He could care less if his presence caused a stir. His mind was fully focused on the child in his arms. There was no way to protect Peter from the chaotic scene that now surrounded them. Peter whipped his head in multiple directions, his eyes struggling to take in everything around him. An agent motioned for Steve to hand him Peter.

"We're taking him to SHIELD headquarters, Fury's orders". Before Steve could respond, the agent was already carrying Peter away. Peter-having been momentarily distracted by the commotion around him-began to struggle. He shrieked; kicking and clawing at the agent. "No!" He screamed, reaching toward Steve for help. "Cap!" He called. "Help!" Peter looked pleadingly into the eyes of the superhero. Steve had seen children suffer from the effects of war; emotionally and physically. He had seen many kids worse off than Peter- Peter was alive. But still, looking back, Steve still wasn't sure what exactly drew him so strongly to Peter. All he knew was that he felt responsible for the boy and that seeing him cry was a sight he couldn't bear.

"Tell Fury that I'll be escorting the child". Steve said, not leaving it up to debate. Peter finally broke free and ran to him, standing behind him for protection. The agent shrugged, clearly happy to be rid of the brat.

"Don't leave me", Peter whimpered.

Steve knelt to meet the boy at eye level. "I'm right here, Peter. I'm not going anywhere."

And just like that, Steve Roger's life changed once again. That night, Steve took a silent vow to protect Peter; to shield him away from the horrors of the world as best as he could. No one would ever be allowed to hurt Peter, not while Steve was still alive and breathing.

"The Parkers destroyed all files that contained any trace of what they were working on." Coulson later informed him. "But we did manage to find a tape."

The tape was dated two years before. The footage shown was of Richard Parker working in his lab. His back was to the camera as he talked to someone.

"I know it hurts, baby, but it'll be over really quick."

Richard turned back to the camera and filled the syringe with a liquid before turning back to his patient. The patient let out a tiny whimper as Richard injected them with the substance. Then Richard suddenly moved away from the camera, to reveal his own son. Then the scene stopped and quickly changed. This tape was dated a few hours before the Parkers death.

"Peter, if you're watching this, then I was probably killed for the knowledge of my work. If my work were to fall in the wrong hands, the consequences would be dyer. I've burned any trace that the serum had ever existed, but there is still one crucial point of evidence that couldn't be destroyed. It's the key to unlocking the affects of the serum. Son, listen closely; the key is inside of you. I'm sorry, Peter. Since you were born you had been injected with the serum and so far it hasn't taken any affect, but there are people who will come looking for you. People that will stop at nothing to reveal the secrets of the formula. I know there is no justification for what I have done to you, but you have to believe me when I say that I love you. I love you very much, son. "

Richard began to sob. Then after a moment, he collects himself and redirects his attention to the camera.

If SHIELD has managed to find this tape, then you know the severity of the situation. Peter will always be in grave danger-you have to protect him. If he is confiscated, humanity as we know it will come to an end. Please…I'm begging you. Protect my boy.

The tape ends.

There were less than a handful of things Steve Rogers and Tony Stark could agree on. Steve always tried to remain a calm demeanor no matter what was being thrown his way- whether in making decisions as leader of The Avengers or taking on life's more trivial problems. Tony's behavior was erratic-teetering somewhere between insanity and brilliance. Steve was old-fashioned; always making an attempt to follow the rules. Tony was modern; making it his personal goal to break every existing rule in one swift decision. The two constantly clashed- which, for the Avengers, meant an ongoing power struggle that only resulted in chaos. Yet despite their differences, there were two things the men always managed to unfailingly agree upon. First, for some unknown reason that went against all rationale and natural order-both men were irrevocably in love with one another. Second, they would go to any length to ensure the safety of their son. But as far as the second had come, it hadn't come easy at first.

When Peter entered Steve's life, his relationship with Tony was still very complex. Tony and Steve had only been officially together for a year-not counting the year where they were still sneaking around and the relationship only went a far as sex. And certainly not counting the years they spent as friend's-dancing around their feelings like a choreographed stage production. Now the relationship was out and growing more and more in intensity with each passing day. Tony had significantly begun to calm but he was still a loose cannon and he absolutely hated children. Steve knew that he was risking his relationship but he also felt this intense connection to Peter. There was something about the boy that had Steve already risking what he loved the most in order to ensure his safety.

"I think you've taken one too many blows to the head." Tony had said when Steve brought up the possibility of becoming Peter's guardian. "I mean, we're not talking about a puppy, here. This is a kid! "Tony was pacing around his workshop, looking around aimlessly for a tool he needed but had long since forgotten what it was.

"I know what he is, Tony." Steve said patiently. "I'm aware of the weight behind my decision."

"Do you, now?" Tony said petulantly. "Does it look we're running a day care here? Do we just dress up in order to entertain the neighborhood children? I'm sorry, but I was under the impression that we stop terrorists- aliens, from blowing up the goddamn world." Tony was fiddling with one of the Iron man suits. Steve moved so he was directly behind him.

"You saw Richard Parkers' tape. It's only a matter of time that whoever murdered Peter's parents will come after him too. Even if they don't figure out what Richard did to Peter-he's still a witness." With every word, Steve could feel a sense of urgency rising within him. "They'll kill him-or worse."

Tonys' back was still to him but he had noticeably gone rigid. Steve knew that for that moment he had his full attention.

"You weren't there", Steve continued. "You didn't see the blood….the bodies… SHIELD can change his identity, send him outta state, but they'll still find him. If I take him in then I can ensure his protection."

"We don't know the effects of the formula." Tony added, still tinkering with something.

"Better The Avengers handle it than someone else."

Tony finally turned to face him. "Well, you obviously are not leaving this open for negotiation." Steve placed his hands on his loves shoulders. Tony was trying to keep his expression blank but Steve could still see the fear; he knew him so well.

"I know it doesn't make much sense. I know that I have no right to force this on you. I love you, Tony. I know you don't like sappy but I just need you to know that I won't blame you if you decide to walk away."

A long, uncomfortable silence followed before either of them spoke. Then Tony simply said, his back was again to Steve: "I'll get back to you on that." All Steve could do was nod and walk away; not knowing if this was the end of their relationship. All because of a silent promise to protect an orphaned boy-Steve would lose Tony.

In the end, Tony managed to surprise him by staying. It wasn't long before Tony had also fallen for the little orphaned boy. And it took some time but Tony eventually was able to rid his fears and become a father to Peter. Then Tony surprised Steve once again when he asked to marry him. A new birth certificate was forged and Peter Parker was renamed Peter Rogers. One step at a time, they became a family.

Being the child of Captain America and Ironman came with its own set of danger; SHIELD agents were assigned to pose as his parents whenever he would be seen in public. Whenever he was with his dads, he was with Peter Rogers-Stark; adopted child of Captain America and Iron man. To the public world, he was simply Peter Rogers; born son of a banker and piano teacher. In his heart though, Steve knew that no change of identity could erase the truth that he was Peter Parker; son of Richard and Mary. He would forever be in danger of being found out.

All it took was a random spider bite from one of Oscorps experiments to fully activate the effects of the serum in his DNA. Peter was given enhanced strength, speed, and agility. And to the horror of his dads, Peter took on the identity of the superhero Spider-Man. Peter believed that this was his calling in life. For once in his life he didn't feel so helpless-the Amazing Spider-man could take care of himself. Tony contemplated locking the teenage boy up until he was eighteen but they both knew that this was something that they couldn't stop Peter from doing. Sure, now that their son had powers of his own, he no longer needed agents following his every step but it still meant that their son would constantly be putting himself in the line of fire to protect others. Steve knew that Peter wouldn't be able to live with himself if he was unable to safe someone. It would break him beyond repair. And that's what worried him.

Life went on and despite a few close calls-on his own and the other while helping the Avengers- Peter was a successful hero. Little did they know that after almost two years as Spider-man, tragedy would strike. Peter would not only lose someone he truly loved, but he would lose himself as well. He would withdrawal so far into his grief that Tony and Steve would try anything to bring him back. The hardest thing for a parent is to watch their child slowly self destruct and be unable to help them. Captain America and Iron man knew how to handle everything from terrorist attacks to alien invasions.-as long as they could see the enemy they were able to stop them. But how were they supposed to protect Peter when the enemy was himself?

Forty-eight hours before tragedy

Steve awoke to the sound of his own heart pounding in his chest. His eyes were filled with terror and his body was drenched in sweat. Mind still clouded by sleep and anxiety; he looked around franticly, unable to remember where he was.

"Easy there, Cap." A familiar voice said, gently placing a hand on Steve's chest, coaxing him to lay back town. The arc reactor illuminated the darkness, tinting Tony's face a bluish color.

"Tony?" Steve whispered, silently willing his heart rate to slow.

"I'm here, love." Tony reassured him, running his fingers through his lover's hair.

"Peter!" Steve gasped, suddenly remembering. He jolted up, ready to run to his son's room.

"Peter's in his apartment. You were dreaming."

Steve sat on the edge of the bed and let out a long breath. Yes, it was just a dream. Their son wasn't in any danger…..But how could they be sure-

"He texted me to let us know that he got home alright." Tony said, reading his mind. "You were already asleep when he sent it." He placed his hands on the super soldiers' broad shoulders before sliding them on his chest.

'Can't we put a tracer or something on him?" Steve offered.

"I'm shocked!" Tony gasped. "The great Captain America-the very symbol of liberty- wants to put a tracer on his son?" Tony teased. Steve glared. Tony laughed. "We already tried that, remember? He disabled it."

"I just hate not having him here." Steve confessed. "At least when he was here, I knew that he made it home. That he was safe in his bed."

"He's nineteen, Steve. He's starting his own life now. He's a good kid. Besides, his superhero activity should be the least of our worries right now. Now college, that's scary." Steve raised an eyebrow questioningly at Tony.

"Are you unaware of the shit that goes down in college? Partying, drinking, sexual experimentation… I once woke up on a tree branch, naked, holding a giant stuffed Panda that-"

"Okay! I get it! You were a terror in college."

"All my life, actually. Anyway, my point is that we are lucky Peter doesn't take after me. He takes after you, Steve and for that I am eternally grateful."

Steve smiled, his blue eyes dancing in the light from the arc reactor. Tony was the only person who could easily make him smile despite the situation. Every part of his body responded to his voice. His very soul ached whenever his penetrating brown eyes stared into his. Neither his body nor his soul was his own; they are and would always belong to Tony.

"He has your big mouth", Steve teased.

"Hey! I res-" Before Tony could finish, Steve was already kissing him. When the kiss was done, Tony was left breathless. His dark brown eyes stared in childish wonderment at his younger-barely aging-husband.

"I got nothing", He breathed. They continued to kiss. Whatever fear that had plagued Steve's mind moments before had vanished. At the moment, it was just about the two of them being alone-being together, and living completely in the moment.

Sunlight penetrated the blinds; slowly washing over her bare back. The sunlight caught her light blonde hair, setting it a-blaze with gold. Peter lay beside her, propping his head up on his elbow-his brown hair in disarray; sticking up in multiple directions. He wasn't sure how long he had been up-watching her sleep. All he knew was that he was deeply in love with this girl.

He couldn't help himself. Careful not to jostle the bed, he reached under his bed for his camera case. He adjusted the settings so the camera would simply use the natural sunlight to capture the moment as his very eyes saw it. She must have sensed the camera after the first shot.

"Paparazzi, so early?" Gwen said, shifting from her stomach onto her side.

"Sorry Miss Stacey", Peter said, exaggerating a Brooklyn dialect. "I got mouths to feed-a wife at home. These pictures will be worth a fortune."

"The name's soon to be Mrs. Parker, buddy, she pointed out." She paused for a moment, pondering. "Mrs. Parker Rodgers-Stark? Or is it just Rogers?"

"We'll sort that out legally later." He waved his hand dismissively. "But let's just go with Parker for now."

"Parker it is", she smiled.

Growing up, Peter had to assume multiple identities in order to ensure his safety. At home with his dads, he was Peter Stark-Rogers. On paper, he was simply Peter Rogers. In his past, he was Peter Parker. It was quite confusing growing up-even today he had to take a moment before answering when someone asked for his name.

She grabbed his arm, forcing him to lie back down. He wrapped his arms around her and she rested her cheek against his chest. "Are you nervous about tonight?" Peter asked. "A little." Gwen confessed. "My mom's going to freak out...And not to mention that I'll be taking Captain America and Iron man's baby away...think they'll have SHIELD arrest me?"

"Are you kidding? They love you!" Peter said. "I'm the one who should be scared. Dad will probably punch me and Pops will probably have a heart attack. Your mom will probably round up her cop friends and put a target on my back. She never really liked me."

"She'll learn to love you as much as I do." She kissed his lips. "Whoa, we're really doing this, aren't we?"

"Yeah, we are."

Asking Gwen to marry him had been spur –of- the- moment but as soon as the words had left his lips, he was certain that he never wanted anything more. He had asked her about a month ago. He had been wounded in an intense battle and-so he wouldn't worry his dad's-he had taped on Gwen's apartment window. He was a mess but she managed to stay calm and use her training in first aid to patch him up.

He had watched her intently as she wet a rag and began cleaning off the dry blood on his forehead. She had done this multiple times before-patch him up when he got hurt. She had been there for him even before he had become Spider-man. She was the only person that could truly be himself around. She was one of the few people that knew about his past. He found himself studying her blue eyes, the way her forehead furrowed, the shape of her lips, the freckles on her nose… Yes, she was his perfection. She was the one person he could see himself spending the rest of his life with.

"Marry me", he blurted.

Gwen paused for a moment, the rag in mid air, before recovering and going back to tending his wounds. "You hit your head pretty hard", she remarked.

"No, it's not. I'm serious. I want you to marry me. I want you to be my wife." He had to make her understand.

At this she put the rag down and met his eyes. "Marry you?" She asked, her blue eyes widening as she processed his words." Peter, we can't…."

"Why not?" He challenged. "Because we're too young? That doesn't matter, Gwen."

"Our parents…." She started

"What about them? Let's pretend that no one else in the world exists right now. Forget all the trivial things." He was holding her face in his hands, taking in the smell of her perfume. "All that matters is that I love you and I want to be with you."

"I love you too, Peter. So much."

"Then what's stopping us? If growing up with The Avengers has taught me anything, it's taught me that you don't know when your last day will be-so you got to make the most of the time you have left. And whatever time I have left-a minute, a day, ten years- I want to spend it with you."

Tears were forming in her eyes; he wiped them away with his fingers. She let out a light laugh. "You're right", she said. She kissed him deeply and then broke the kiss to look him in the eyes once again. "I'll marry you", she said. A huge smile spread across his face and he moved in to kiss her, only to be stopped by her hand. "On the condition that our marriage doesn't stop us from finishing college."

"Of course", he agreed.

They resumed their passionate kissing. Then she pulled away once more to speak. "This better not be some ploy to get me into bed because if it is, I swear to God I'll-" Before she could finish his lips were once again on hers. "Gwen… will you please shut up now?" He said between breaths.

Now here they were, a month later. Lying side by side in his bed. It had been their first time together-both their first ever. They held each other close and stole kisses. For the moment, any worries about breaking the news to their parents were gone; this was their time and no one else existed.


	2. Chapter 2: Choices

_Author's Note:_

_Wow! I am overjoyed that I have followers in just the short amount this story has been up! Thank you very much! I do ask though that you take a moment of your time to leave a review because it really helps motivate me in some of my most difficult times. And, it's my first time writing about Superfamily / Captain America and Iron man and I am not too sure what I'm doing lol. I didn't expect to update already but to be frank, my life kind of sucks right now and writing is the only thing keeping me from going completely insane. So, I hope you are still enjoying reading it and don't be surprised when I crush all your hopes and dreams! ;) Thank you and please review is you want the next chapter to come out right away!_

Peter had spent an hour standing in front of his bathroom mirror rehearsing how he was going to break the news to his dads. In front of the mirror he was calm and confident-left no room for debate on the subject. By the time he finally left to meet them for dinner, he was ready to take on Iron Man and Captain America.

Yet here he was; already halfway through dinner and he had barely spoken a word. He wondered if Gwen had told her mother yet. To avoid any catastrophes, Peter and Gwen had decided it would be best to break the news separately. Peter was now regretting that decision -they couldn't kill him if he had brought a witness.

They were sitting in the dining room - something they only used on special occasions. Steve's lists of special occasions were significantly expanding; Peter visiting from college was now one of them. So far it had been a typical dinner in the Rogers-Stark household; complete with Steve scolding Tony for doing work at the table and Tony bringing up one of his absurd and disturbing stories just to watch the both of them cringe. All that was needed was a villain crashing through the window and dinner would be complete. Growing up, Peter's definition of normalcy was different from the rest of the world - what others considered abnormal was usually his normal. But despite this fact, both of his dads had worked hard to try to give him some kind of normalcy; at least what they figured was normal.

His phone suddenly vibrates in his pocket, causing him to jump. It's a lengthy text from Gwen.

**Gwen: Once I was able to convince them I wasn't marrying you to hide an unwanted pregnancy, they handled it better than expected. Mom thinks I'm throwing my life away etc. Still thinks she can talk me out of it. Uncle Joe wants to have a "talk" with you. How did yours take it?**

**Peter: Does this talk involve me losing vital organs? Haven't told them yet…**

**Gwen: Peter…. -_-**

"Put the phone away, Peter". Steve says curtly. "You and your father can survive a few minutes without those darn things."

Tony had also taken the opportunity to use his phone. Engrossed in a message, he hadn't even heard Steve. When he finally looked up from the screen, he was met with an intense glare from Steve.

"What?" Tony asked innocently. "_I finished!"_He insisted, gesturing to his nearly empty plate. Steve continued to glare until Tony finally put the phone away.

"Captain Tight ass", he mumbled under his breath, slouching like a defiant child that didn't get his way.

"I'll never understand everyone's fascination with cell phones!" Steve declared. "In my day, people still talked to each other."

"All right, grandpa. Hold on to your knickers, will ya?" Tony mocked.

His dads were infamous for their back and forth banter - the longest recorded session lasted three hours. If Peter wanted to get a word in then he had to do it before they really got going.

"You're obsessed with your-"

"Pops!" Peter called, waving his hands around to catch Steve's attention. Tony had gone back to using his cell phone. "Dad!" He whined, causing Tony to look up. Finally he had both of their attention. Suddenly his mouth felt really dry. "I-I have some news." He coughed. His fathers were watching him expectantly. "It's hot in here", Peter complained. He was stalling.

"What did you do?" Tony asked suspiciously. He had his business face on.

"I didn't do anything!" Peter insisted.

"Go on, sport." Steve urged him, casting a glance at Tony.

Peter took a deep breath. "Well, you see…..Gwen –"

"_Oh Shit!"_ Tony blurted, interrupting him and causing Steve to look around quizzically. "_For Christ's sake, Peter!"_ Tony exclaimed, practically jumping out of his seat. "You could have come to me for condoms - how could you get her pregnant?!"

"Huh!? Dad, she's –"

"Gwen's pregnant?" Steve's blue eyes went wide with horror before quickly switching to disappointment. "I thought you two were smarter than that- I mean I know young people don't wait anymore but-"

"Gwen's _not_ pregnant!" Peter shouted, cutting off their simultaneous chatter.

"She's not?" Tony asked. Peter furiously shook his head. Tony let out a sigh of relief. "Well, thank God for that." He said, lowering himself back down in his seat. "I'm too young to be somebody's grandpa."

_This was going to be bad._ How embarrassing it would be if only the city knew that The Amazing Spider-man himself was afraid to man up to his parents! But then again, anyone would take pity if they knew his parents were Captain America and Iron Man….

"Gwen is not pregnant", Peter reiterated. "So you guys can put that out of your mind, okay?"

"What's the news, son?" Steve pressed. "We're listening." Both of the men leaned forward in anticipation. Under their heavy gaze, it took Peter a moment to collect himself. His instincts reverted back to when he was a child and did something wrong: _Run! Hide!_ No, Peter was no longer a child. He was a man now - a soon to be married man - and now was his chance to prove himself. So Peter straightened himself in his seat and took a deep breath.

"Gwen and I are getting married", he said evenly. "I asked her a month ago and she said yes. We're getting married and I'm not going to change my mind." He was met with wide eyes and silence. He began to lose his cool demeanor. "Okay….?"

Both of the heroes were left completely stunned. Tony's jaw hung open and Steve's eyebrows were raised so high that they almost touched his hairline. "Did our nineteen year old son just say he was getting _married?" _Tony asked Steve, eyes still on Peter. Steve simply nodded. "And what money does he expect to support his wife with? Taking selfies for the Bugle isn't enough to support a family", Tony said. Then his eyes widened in realization. "Oh god, don't tell me your planning on moving the both of you back here!"

"No! I- I was actually thinking of taking up that job at Stark Towers you offered", Peter explained. Between that job and Gwen's at Oscorp, we can make it. Plus, we're still going to finish school.

"And what if Gwen becomes pregnant? What then? How do you expect to go to school, work, play hero, and take care of the baby at the same time?" Tony said. He was now standing - beginning to pace. "It's not as easy as you think."

"I was um, planning on not sleeping. And what is it with you and babies? We'll be careful." Peter said. He took discipline for him not to allow himself to shrink down in his seat. _A baby? Babies were out of the question!_

"Marriage is a big step. A step I don't think you're ready for." Steve added, maintaining composure, although Tonys pacing was making him anxious.

"You didn't think I could handle being Spider-man but I proved you wrong." Peter stated. They both shot him a death glare. They didn't look pleased with his answer; Peter decided to ease down his defiant tone. "What I mean to say is that I know that this is the right decision for me. I love her; that's not going to change."

"You can love her all you want, but why marry? What's the rush? Do you really want to be divorced at 20? Can't you just live in sin like most of the kids your age!?" Tony asked, rubbing his eyes. He swore that this kid made him age faster than any of Fury's crazy missions.

"Being a hero can put a real strain on your marriage", Steve added. "You have to always prepare for the worst. What if - God willing not - that something happened to you? What do you expect Gwen to do then?"

Peter took a moment before answering. Peter had learned from a young to prepare for the worst. Having dads as superheroes meant that there was a great chance that one or both of them wouldn't come home. Now that Peter was a superhero, that very fact also applied to him now. Gwen also knew very well how it felt to not know if her dad would come home. Her father was Captain Stacey; a big part of the NYPD. She once told Peter that she would pray every night for her father's safe return. Peter was forced to watch as Captain Stacey took his very last breath….Peter hated himself for not being able to safe him. The guilt of his death was omnipresent- shoved to the very back of his mind that way he could still function without the guilt weighing him down. Gwen and Peter knew better than anyone else that people didn't always come back – to prepare for the worst.

"Gwen's father died in the line of duty-we've talked about all that." Peter said. "Growing up, I was never sure if either of you were coming back... And that's precisely why we are going through with this; we don't know what will happen tomorrow. All we know is that we want to spend whatever amount we have as husband and wife. You guys always tell me to make every moment in life count. Well, I'm taking your advice."

Steve and Tony shared a quick glance - indicating one of their mental exchanges. "I understand where you're coming from, Peter." Steve said. "But you're both still young. You still have your whole lives ahead of you."

"My parents must have thought the same thing", Peter blurted. It was as if the air had been sucked out of the room. They must have been like him and Gwen at one point: Young, happy, and alive. When they married, they must have thought that the "til death do us part" vow would have come much later in life than it did. Peter kept a picture of the three of them near his bed. The picture was taken in central park –Peter must have been four or five when the photo was taken - he is sitting comfortably between them. Richard has his arm around Mary; she smiles that kind of smile that touches a person's eyes- the smile of truth happiness. Did they expect to one day be brutally murdered? In the tape, Richard sure seemed to be aware of the possibility. Did they make every moment count?

The two men were at once on either side of their son. Tony placed his hand on his sons shoulder. "I'd take a bullet to the chest before letting anything happen to you", Tony said, looking down at his son. Steve nodded in agreement. "You're everything to us, Sport."

"But you're still a kid", Tony added. "You haven't experienced enough to decide that you want to be with someone for the rest of your life. Hell, I was much older until I was ready to settle down. Marriage isn't a walk in the park", he said, meeting his husbands blue eyes. "It's always a work in progress. Something that you can easily screw up if you aren't ready for it." Tony gave Steve a little smirk.

"Everything that has happened to me -even being Spider-man- was out of my control", Peter said, eyes staring intently at the table. "Nothing's been 100% my choice- except her. Gwen is the one thing that makes sense in my life and I'll fight to keep her in it with every last breath." Peter's heart was pounding from the intensity of his words; words he had never spoken before- a truth that never dawned on him until now. "You two are happy, so you have to understand how Gwen and I feel."

Steve just had to take one look at Tony to know that they had been defeated. Tony was relentless and could easily suede the opposite party in his favor but if he was silent - then that meant there was no way of winning the argument. "Damn", Tony muttered to himself as if he had lost a deal. "The kid's good." He let out a huge puff of breath.

"You've made your choice." Steve stated. Peter nodded. "And there's nothing we can say to change your mind?" "Nope." Peter agreed. Steve looked hard at his son's face. His face was still boyish - but there was a change Steve couldn't quite put into words. How had he grown so fast? "Well, let our daughter in law know that she is invited to dinner tomorrow night." Peter flashed a wide smile and looked at Tony for confirmation. "Unacceptable", he said, shaking his head disapprovingly. Peter felt his heart sink. "No daughter in law of mine is going to work at Oscorp", Tony declared. "I'll see what I can do about getting her a job here." Peter practically flung himself at his dads, embracing them both in a hug that was a bit too strong for Tony. Then he dashed to the front door and began putting on his coat.

"I gotta tell Gwen! Thanks for dinner!" Peter rushed out the door only to stick his head back in a minute later. "Thanks, dads." He smiled. Then he shut the door and was gone. The two men stood there staring at the door, still in shock over the whole conversation.

"This is all _your_ fault", Tony declared.

"Mine?" Steve gawked.

"You and your old fashioned ideals have polluted our son", Tony said, pouring himself more wine. "I think I'd prefer it if he was commitment phobic."

Steve rolled his eyes. He stood behind Tony, wrapping his arms around him. "He needs to make his own choices- good or bad."

"I know", Tony said, taking another sip of his wine. "Got to hand it to the kid though, he couldn't have done better." Then after a moment he added "I think I did pretty well myself." He smiled at Steve.

"You can see the whole city from up here." Gwen said, resting her head on Peter's shoulder. They were on the roof top of one of New York's largest buildings; a spot Peter always enjoyed but hadn't shown Gwen until now. It was a chilly night- Gwen had on her sweater and Peter's jacket on top. His Spider-Man costume didn't provide much warmth but he didn't really get cold.- besides, any body warmth he had was used for Gwen. His mask was off, allowing the cold air to lick at his cheeks.

"I like to come here to think."" Peter said, looking out at all the twinkling city lights. This was the first time he had brought someone here- he always felt it was his own private spot-but having Gwen beside him seemed very right.

"What do you think about?" She inquired.

He shrugged. "I don't…_stuff?_" He offered.

"_Stuff."_ She mimicked him in a deep voice.

He laughed. "Everything! Spider-man stuff…..ugh… school, my dads…you.. my parents…" His voice trailed off. Gwen looked up at Peter. Whenever his biological parents were brought up, this lost look would come across his face that reminded her of a lost child. He had told her all about his biological parents and she knew how hard it was to lose a parent-she couldn't imagine losing both.

"Do you remember them well?" She asked, tracing her fingers along the spider web patterns on his costume.

"I remember little things, here and there", Peter said. "I remember the spell of my mother's perfume. My dad's office had purple curtains…you know, just trivial stuff." Peter shrugged it off like to big deal, but his eyes gave him away. He bit his lip and turned his face away from her.

"Richard experimented on me - I was his lab rat." Peter said, gritting his teeth. "I just can't help but think that that's all I might have been to him: an experiment."

Gwen took his face in her hands so that he was forced to look her in the eyes. "They gave their life to keep you safe, Peter. If you were just an experiment, then it would have been so much easier to just hand you over." His penetrating eyes searched her face –what was he searching for?

"My life is….it's a lot to take in." Peter forced a smile but he was uncomfortable. "My parents worked for SHIELD….My dads are the greatest heroes that ever lived….Do you still -I mean, I wouldn't blame you if..if-"

Gwen put her hand over his mouth to silence him. "I love you Peter. That's what's important. Forget about everything else, remember? Whatever happens we'll be stronger because we'll be facing it together."

He cocked his head, his childish eyes wide in wonderment. "Are you for real?" Peter asked with true sincerity.

"Asked the guy in the spandex costume". Gwen joked. They laughed- the playfulness returning to Peter's eyes. There was a full moon and the two of them stared in silence at its beauty- its mystery. It seemed palpable; like it could so easily be plucked out of the sky. Gwen smiled to herself. "You make my life pretty amazing", she said aloud, not taking her eyes off of it. Peter kissed the top of her head; inhaling the very essence of this very special woman that for some mysterious reason chose to love him. The love they shared was unlike anyone else's- it exceeded all time, all reason. It was strong enough to with stand anything….

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	3. Chapter 3: Peter Parker

**Author's Note:** _Come on, guys! I am a comment whore, please indulge me. I want to know what you like so I can keep doing it or not like so I can stop. Fair warning, this chapter is extremely sad.)_

Peter cradled Gwen in his arms, her face turned toward his chest. His dress shirt was unbuttoned—exposing the red and blue Spider-Man costume beneath it. His hands- stained by the blood trickling from the gash on her forehead- unintentionally smearing her face as he preceded to move wisps of blonde hair from her face.

Gwen, he whispered, slowly rocking her back and forth on the carpeted floor of her apartment. She was no longer breathing; the warmth had completely left her body. Her neck seemed odd- like it could no longer support her head. _She's not dead_, he kept silently telling himself. _She's not dead._

"Gwen, you got to open your eyes." He said gently, as though to not startle her from her slumber. "Baby", he said a bit louder. "You got to wake up now, okay? We're getting married, remember? We're getting married, love." He jostled her a bit before finally bringing himself to check for a pulse. "We're getting"- Peter's stopped, his words getting caught and fading away before they could be uttered. The weighted silence lingered.

Sirens began to sound in the distance but they were drowned out by a shriller, animalistic scream that seemed to have erupted from the very core of his soul. He screamed till his throat was burned raw—until he could no longer breathe or hear anything else. Until finally, just as suddenly as the screaming had started, it stopped. He looked down at her face as though he were in a trance. It was as though all his senses had completely shut down. He couldn't hear—the world had gone silent and all that was left was a low humming sound in his ears. He stared into the eyes of the love of his life—the very same eyes that use to penetrate his very soul. The light—the life in them was gone as they stared blankly past him.

She had just called him less than an hour ago. They had made love the night before—her body pressed to his and his lips on top of hers. She was the first thing he had seen that morning before he had left for work.

This wasn't happening. This was a nightmare, right?

The day had started like any other, the only difference being that there was an excitement in the air. It had felt like a fresh start. His dads were expecting them for dinner that night and it would be the young couples first dinner with his dads as an engaged couple. His fathers were accepting his choice and that alone signaled that they accepted him as a man. Up until the day he had asked Gwen to marry him, nothing had really been his choice- not completely. Even becoming Spider-Man hadn't completely been his choice. His powers had been predetermined all because of the formula that Richard had injected into his body without his consent; only needing the bite of a genetically altered Oscorp spider to be activated. Gwen was completely his choice from the beginning. Peter had never wanted anything as much as Gwen- whether subconsciously or intentional, he gravitated towards her.

Peter had managed to get Jameson to allow him to leave work early, promising that he would in return receive some very candid photos of Iron Man and Captain America; which his dads would probably kill him for. Dinner was at seven and he would swing by her house at six. It had been a quiet day crime wise. The biggest things he had done as Spider-man that day was stopping a purse snatcher, and breaking up a fight among kids. But the world could have crumbled that day and his main concern would have this been making this dinner.

About an hour before he would pick her up, Gwen had called- but by then he had gotten evolved in assisting the police in a high speed chase .By the time he checked his phone it was seven twenty and he had a voicemail from Gwen. He had figured it was just her inquiring where he was so instead of checking it, he shot her a text that he was on his way over. He had had no idea what awaited him at her apartment...

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**Rogers- Stark residence**

The lovebirds were an hour and a half late, Tony silently noted. Steve's punctuality had yet to rub off on their son – he took after Tony in that department. Steve had spent meticulous detail on the meal; running around the kitchen like the entire world was riding on this dinner – handling it with an intensity and concentration that suited the preparation of the atomic bomb rather than the preparation of a home cooked meal. Any of Tonys attempts to help all ended with Steve swatting him away and insisting on doing it himself. Peter had assured them that he was on his way and would be there in twenty minutes- that was an hour ago.

"What's keeping them," Steve asked impatiently, glancing down at his watch. "I thought they were on their way."

"I'm sure they got caught up in undressing rather than dressing themselves", Tony remarked. "They're probably ravaging each other's bodies as we speak."

"Something might have happened", Steve said, ignoring Tony's comment. "Jarvis, has there been any new reports on Spider-man within the last few hours?"

"According to the news, Spider-Man was spotted assisting the police in a high speed chase- successfully obtaining the driver. Damage minimal. No casualties." The AI voice responded.

"See? He's fine." Tony said, picking at a bread roll. Steve noticeably relaxed though, taking a seat at the kitchen table.

"So, do we have a plan?" Tony asked. Steve raised an eyebrow. "To convince them to come to their senses", Tony clarified.

"I'm not sold on the idea either, but this is Peter's decision and if he breaks it off, it will have to have been his decision also." Steve stated.

"This won't end well, we both know it. Gwen is a great girl but they're kids.

"Peter sounded pretty sure about it", Steve said. "They do love each other-I know that for sure. I can see it in the way they look at each other."

"He's nineteen! Anything with breasts turns him 're in lust", Tony rolled his eyes. "He's not a soldier on leave- this is not the 1940's. The rate of divorce is already high and even higher for kids. Everything's against them. There's no way they'll last."

"What about us?" Steve asked, an amused smile curling his lips. "You didn't think we'd last either."

"But that's different-"

"No it's not," Steve interjected. "If anything, the odds were against us, more than it could ever be for Peter and Gwen. What we have isn't exactly we had listened to people then we wouldn't have had what we have now. It was a gamble on both parts."

Caught off guard by Steve's response, it took Tony a moment to get back to his point. "We weren't kids, though."

"Have you met yourself? "Steve said affectionately, laughing.

"Ow, Cap! Tony joked. "That one hurt! I'm supposed to be the sarcastic one. I've corrupted America's golden boy!"

"I was a goner from the first time we met." Steve said, his smile touching his deep blue eyes.

Best gamble of my life. Tony said.

The sound of Tony's cell phone cut their tender moment short.. Peter's picture appeared on the caller ID.

"Are you planning on coming to dinner sometime this century?" Tony asked. There was no response. He could hear breathing; staggered- heavy. "Peter?"

"Dad." Peter finally managed to utter.

"Peter? Are you alright?" Tony asked. Steve- hearing the fear seep into Tony's words- was now at his side, asking Tony what was going on. Tony switched the phone to speaker. All that could be heard was Peter's heavy breathing.

"It's Gwen." He finally said, his voice breaking on her name. Was he crying? This caused a visceral reaction in both men; each others fear reflected in the other's eyes.

"Did you two get into an argument", Steve asked carefully.

"She's not breathing"…Peter said, voice trailing off. I-I think she's… Oh God."

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**Gwen's apartment**

Both men had feared the worse when they finally arrived to Gwen's apartment. Steve expected to find her apartment in complete shambles but when they arrived, the apartment appeared untouched; no sign of a break in. Obscured by darkness, it took them a moment to see their son. Peter sat on the floor, back to them—moonlight highlighting his silhouette in the darkness. He cradled something in his arms… Simultaneously Steve removed his Captain America mask and Tony raised his Iron Man face plate. They shared an apprehensive look as they cautiously approached their son.

Once Steve was close to his son he realized that it was Gwen he held in his arms. Other than the moonlight, the blue light from Tony's arc reactor was his only source of light—Tony used it as a flash light to illuminate Peter.

Steve knelt down in front of Peter—his son's eyes blank and unable to be torn away from Gwen's face. There was a large gash on her head that was now caked in dry blood. Peter's dress shirt was thrown to the side and covered in blood—most likely what he had used to stop the bleeding. Gwen most likely put up a struggle and her attackers had struck her. The blood didn't trouble him as much as the unnatural angle of her neck… A low sound escaped from Tony's lips—his thoughts echoing Steve's. That's when he realized that Gwen was gone. The blow to the head hadn't killed her: her neck had been _snapped._

"Peter." Steve said, gently putting a hand on his son's shoulder. Peter's large brown eyes remained on Gwen. "I'm here, son—dad too. Nod if you can hear me."

"Are you gonna make her better?" Peter said in a child like voice. His eyes were still on Gwen.

"Peter—"

"She's cold. I can't make her warm."

Steve desperately looked up at Tony who seemed in shock as well before finally breaking away from his thoughts. "Peter, I need you to listen carefully." Tony said; his voice stern but not lacking sensitivity. "What I'm about to tell you isn't—"

"She's sleeping", Peter said, deliberately cutting Tony off. Somewhere, buried in the corners of his mind, he knew the truth of the situation but he refused to admit it.

"Son, Gwen's— "

"No." Peter shook his head.

"Dead—"

"No!" Peter protested, furiously shaking his head.

"Yes she is, Peter." Tony said gently.

"No, you're wrong."

"Peter— "

"She's not dead!" Peter yelled, his head snapping up to look Tony in the eye; holding his gaze like a dog challenging another to a fight. Then he once again lowered his gaze to Gwen. "She's not." He whispered.

He seemed so child-like—so frightened. Steve couldn't help but be reminded of that day. That day where two little eyes had met his from a hiding place in the closet. When little hands rested upon his to hold up the Captain America shield. Steve's shield had been enough able to block out the truth that night. But now, his shield was useless. There was no denying the truth now. There was absolutely no way to protect Peter from the truth now.

Steve reached for his son.

"DON'T YOU FUCKING TOUCH HER!" He growled in an unfamiliar voice. The voice was feral; rising from deep within and resonating in his chest. Steve was taken back but quickly regained his composure. Steve had had to deal with hysterical people before: prisoners of war, civilians not wanting to leave deceased loved ones; but it felt different when it involved your own child. The sorrow, the helplessness he felt was overwhelming. He felt crippled.

"There's nothing more you can do for her", Steve said gently.

Peter didn't say anything for a long time. He continued to rock Gwen back and forth, picking up a bit of speed as he went. The sight was heartbreaking for both men to see.

"It's my fault she's dead", Peter finally choked out after a long while.

"Don't say that, Peter. Don't even think it." Steve told him.

Peter shook his head rapidly. "No, you don't understand."

It wasn't until now- Peter having brought to his attention- that Steve noticed the crumpled up paper he had balled up in his fist. Steve held his palm up to receive it and Peter reluctantly discharged it into his hand. The paper was damp from the warmth of Peter's hand. It was stained by Gwen's blood. With tightness in his chest, Steve began to un-crumple the paper. Two words – Two words scrawled across the paper in large letters. A name:

PETER PARKER

Never before had a name instilled such fear. Tony's eyes filled with anger. His mouth opened to spit a protest only to suppress whatever words by gritted teeth. His parents' murderers were back and they had found Peter— did they know about the spider bite? This was some kind of sick warning – but why Gwen? What did these insidious murderers hope to gain by killing her?

"I'm sorry Gwen", he sobbed into her hair. "I'm sorry….I'm sorry…." The rest of his words were indecipherable— muddled by sobs. Steve caught the word "wedding". And that's when he noticed the engagement ring on Gwen's finger; simple but elegant. It had been among the stuff left to the boy from his parents— it had been his grandmother's.

Steve once again made an attempt to lay a hand on his son's shoulder; this time Peter didn't protest. "We have to go." Tony said, his voice hoarse. Peter's eye's shifted between his two fathers before once again landing on Gwen. His eyes conflicted as he weighed his decision.

"I'll find them, Gwen." He whispered; his big brown eyes pools of sorrow. "I'll make sure they pay, I promise." And with that, he laid one last kiss on his love's stone cold lips.

00000000000000000000000

SHIELD did a sweep of the apartment and came up empty. Despite Tony and Steve's protests, Peter was thoroughly questioned. Peter appeared to be in a daze the entire time—shock was what they called it. Spoke slowly and clearly—eyes seemingly fixed on a spot on the wall. He declined on being taken to a hospital. He just wanted to sleep; to sleep and then wake up from this nightmare.

His dads insisted he spend the night with them. They cleaned the blood off him and tucked him into his bed like he was once again a child. Peter gave no protest. His mind was a million miles away—his body moving mechanically. As soon as his head hit the pillow he was out.

Nothing was going to be okay, but all Peter Parker could do for now was sleep under the watchful eyes of his superhero fathers and dream of Gwen.

_(Hope I didn't scare you guys off! It's only going to get harder from here out. There will be lots of happy family memories inserted though, as well as a deeper look into Tony and Peter's relationship. More of the past will be revealed_ _and lots of surprises along the way. It's going to be a bumpy ride!)_

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	4. Chapter 4: Your Fault

**Author's Note:**

(I had a bit of trouble with this chapter. I just had so many ideas and had to finally narrow them all down and piece them together, and I think it turned out okay but I'll let you be the judge. As you probably know, writing isn't easy and writers block is always an obstacle to face. So like always, I ask that you help out by leaving comments; especially if you want the chapters to come out faster. Thank you for reading!)

"Hey." She whispered lovingly, her face only inches from his. Sunlight entered from the open blinds, setting her golden hair ablaze and outlining her body so she appeared as if she was glowing. He was close enough to see the light freckles on her nose, to feel the warmth of her breath on his face, to look directly into the depths of her eyes and find the love and assurance she always directed towards him. This was _his_ _Gwen_. _Alive. Breathing. All his_. The rational part of his brain told him this was impossible, that he had to be dreaming. He pushed that voice aside.

"Hey." He smiled back, gently pressing his lips against her. This wasn't a dream, he realized. This was reality and everything else had simply been a horrendous nightmare.

"You were talking in your sleep", Gwen said, entwining her fingers with his.

"Bad dream. Really bad. The nightmare to top all nightmares." He brushed his lips against her delicate hand. _Yes. This was real._

"Do you want to talk about it?" She said, concern invading her eyes.

"No. Not now. I just want to lay here and look at you."

"I look like crap", she stated, laughing.

"That's impossible."

He pulled her in, wrapping his arms around her as she placed her head on his chest. He kissed the top of her head and inhaled her scent. _God_, he couldn't get enough of her. They just held each other, listening to their partner's steady breathing—feeling the beat of their hearts within their chests.

"I love you, Gwen."

She didn't answer, and not being able to see her face, he assumed that she had drifted back to sleep. Then she finally spoke.

"Why weren't you there, Peter?"

"What do you mean?" He racked his brain searching for a date he might have missed. Her face was turned away from him. Uneasiness began to build in his chest.

"Why did you let me die?"

Peter jolted awake; sitting up in bed and drenched in perspiration. The other side of his bed was empty—Gwen wasn't there. With wide brown eyes he took in his surroundings before realizing that he was in his room at his dads place. Then it all came rushing back: _Gwen was dead. _They had buried only hours ago. They still didn't know who had killed her. _He let her die_.

Throwing the tangled sheets off his bare legs, Peter scrambled into the hallway and made his into bathroom. _He couldn't breathe!_ Panic washed over him as he quickly scanned the contents within the medicine cabinet. _Please be here!_ He silently begged. _There it is! _He spotted the anxiety medication he used to take up until he was twelve years old. The doctors wanted to slowly ease him off the drugs but he had went cold turkey—a dangerous decision at the time but right now, he was relieved to still have it.

Depositing two little pills into his mouth, he turned on the faucet and chased them down with water. The pills went down hard—upsetting his nearly empty stomach. Taking a deep breath, Peter dared to glance at his reflection. A pale, skinny, sad, hollow of a man stared back at him. A pathetic creature that had all traces of life sucked away.

At the funeral, Gwen's mother had confronted him. She had already buried her husband and now she had buried her daughter. "Where were you!"? She asked. "Bad things started to happen the minute she brought you home—my baby's dead! This is your fault! THIS IS YOUR FAULT!"

_This is your fault._

_This is your fault._

_This is your fault._

_This is your fault._

Her words relentless repeated in his head; an inescapable, sickening sound. The insurmountable guilt that afflicted him was just too much to bear in his waking life—and now the guilt had seeped its way into his dreams.

Every time he closed his eyes he saw Gwen— the girl he would have easily given his own life to protect— with her neck twisted; smeared in her own blood. Every time he closed his eyes, he relived the sheer agony that came with the realization that he was too late—his bride to be was dead. Gwen had been ruthlessly murdered under the protection of Peter, her _superhero _fiancé.

What was the point of being a hero when you were powerless to save the people you loved? What if your very existence caused the death of both your parents and the love of your life? A hero is supposed to protect people—what the hell was he?

_A harbinger of death_

_The bullet shot out of the barrel of a gun_

_He killed his parents._

_He killed Gwen._

Rage fueled by an intense form of self loathing flooded his system. Clutching the edge of the sink, Peter stared unblinkingly at his reflection. His lips quivered. Images flashed through his mind—fragmented pieces –reality and imagination melding together_. His mothers smile. His father's glasses. Gwen running her finger tips across his bare chest. Blood. Blood splattered across the walls of his childhood home. His parents screaming. The piercing sound of gun shots. Gwen screaming his name; begging him to help her…..her body mercilessly being dragged across the floor….the sickening sound of her neck being snapped…._

The next thing he knew, the mirror had shattered into pieces. His hand began to throb and Peter discovered that his knuckles were bleeding; pieces of glass protruding from his flesh. He watched with detached facination as the blood slide down his fingers. _Pain_ is the only certainty in life; _pain and death._

So preoccupied by his own thoughts, Peter barely noticed the bathroom door swinging open.

"Jesus, Peter!" Tony gasped, taking in the shards of broken glass and his sons' mangled fist. "What have you done?"

When Peter finally looked up, Tony no longer recognized his eyes—the warm brown had been swapped with a much darker color. The light innocence of boyhood was gone and in its place was something heavier; jaded. The lives behind those eyes were gone. In an ominous voice that sent chills up Tony's spine, Peter gave an answer.

"I killed Gwen."

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"Fuck." Tony was the first to break the silence. God knows how long Steve and Tony had been sitting; staring off into space on the edge of the bed they shared. Since bandaging up their unresponsive sons hand, neither man could simply go to sleep.

The crass word spoke volumes about all that had transpired. Steve nodded in understanding. "Yeah", was all Steve managed to say.

"I'm going to set up something with a psychologist", Tony continued. "The best we can find. I'll make some calls."

"Peter hasn't seen one of those since he was a kid", Steve said. "Not since the nightmares."

When Peter was a child he had been plagued with the most violent nightmares. Having only been upstairs while his parents were tortured downstairs, it was only natural that Peter would have adjustment problems to say the least but the severity of the nightmares was something neither man could have possibly anticipated. The intensity of the nightmares were so severe that the small child would violently thrash—blindly throwing punches and kicks at an imaginary attacker—to the point where he had to physically be restrained; his screams of horror soon becoming a constant at night. This went on for years, though significantly decreasing throughout the years, until finally stopping around the time Peter turned eight.

"We should take a trip—keep Peter out of New York for a while. At least until we sort this out. Take the semester off", Tony rambled, looking as though he was searching for the answer to an equation. He was trying to simplify the situation.

"Peter just lost the only girl he's ever loved, Tony. Running away isn't going to help him."

"It's better than staying here! Where everything's going to remind him of…." Tony's voice trailed off.

"Gwen", Steve added, feeling a pain in his chest.

As difficult as it was they couldn't pretend she never existed. Gwen was dead, but she would ever be forgotten. She had become a huge part of their family, even before the engagement. There had been no denying that their love surpassed all stereotypes of young love. Steve had always predicted that he'd one day call her his daughter-in-law—much later down the line though— from the very beginning Peter's love for her had burned with a relentless intensity that had worried Tony and Steve in the protective sense of a father looking out for his son. But it had soon become clear that Gwen also returned that intensity, and together their love was powerful enough to illuminate a crowded room of jaded souls. How could a bright, beautiful, nineteen year old girl be dead?

"They found him", Steve. Tony's voice trembled. Tony hated nothing more than feeling helpless.

"I know", Steve whispered, blue eyes glazing over with fear.

They were silent again as their minds slowly processed the fact that they had failed to protect their son. Peter was in danger and they still had no idea who these people were. Were they still the same people who had killed The Parkers? Like the Parkers, Gwen's murderer didn't leave a trace, but the level of brutality wasn't the same.

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After awakening from his icy slumber, Steve had found himself alone in a new world. The only thing that never seemed to change was people. Yes, ideals changed, technology advanced, and manners were lost, but human nature had yet to evolve. War seemed to be the only set thing in any lifetime and as much as Steve despised violence it was what he knew best; he was and will be until the day he dies, a soldier. World War two had long been over but war had carried on into the future; both overseas and on the home front. The Battle of New York— his first battle as leader of the Avengers— had been the first victory he had been awake to see.

Being able to be a soldier once again— being Captain America— had restored a sense of purpose. As Captain America he was collected and in control at all times. But as Steve he was scattered and broken beyond repair. Captain America didn't have to deal with the aftermath: the guilt, the tears, the nightmares; all that belonged to Steve. Steve was willing to endure it over and over again in order to protect innocent lives. He was willing to bleed for his country and sacrifice his sanity in order to protect the world from unimaginable foes. He was willing to die if it meant keeping ones his loved safe. Yet despite all his effort—someone close— his daughter-in-law to be—had been murdered.

"How could these people go undetected for so long?" Steve had asked Fury the night of Gwen's death. On the other side of the one way glass, Peter was being interrogated by an agent. Peter's large brown eyes were vacant as he robotically answered each question. How could they even think of questioning him when he was in such a state? This sight only managed to further infuriate Steve.

"You said that SHIELD had covered up any traces of Peter's existence—that Peter Parker was dead to the world!"

"We've been doing everything we can, Captain. But we had clearly warned Peter of the risks of exposing his identity to outside parties-"

"No! Don't you dare blame my son for this!" Steve hissed.

"I'm going to first have to ask you to take your hands off of me", Fury warned, his good eye looking down at Steve's hand.

Steve hadn't remembered grabbing Fury's collar. He quickly removed his hands. Fury took a moment to smooth down the material before continuing.

"We've known each other for a long time, Rogers", Fury stated. "You may not agree with everything we do here but we've never giving any of you reason to think that the well being of the people that inhabit this planet, as well as the heroes that defend it, is anything less than our priority."

"Because of us, you have retained your anonymity. Your relationship with Stark, as well as Peter's existence, has never been leaked to the public. We have done everything we can to ensure your son's safety, but once he took on the identity of Spider-Man, he became a loose cannon. Your son took a gamble and he lost."

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The tragedy of Gwen's death deeply affected the Stark-Rogers family. It was as if a dark cloud had descended over the household. The hole her absence had created didn't seem as though it could ever be filled. Although Peter was still breathing, it appeared as though any life within him had died with her. Peter had spent the first few days in bed trying to sleep away the inconsolable pain that plagued him. When his body no longer allowed him to sleep, he would stare blankly at the wall—trapped in his own mind. He wouldn't cry, not since they had found Gwen, and that troubled Steve. Peter didn't leave his room. He barely ate, despite Steve's pleas. Peter was wasting away and there was nothing either man could do to stop it

They hadn't expected Peter to want to attend the funeral, but once the day had come, he had dragged himself out of bed and put on a suit. Tony and Steve also attended, hanging back, forced to remain inconspicuous. It was too dangerous for the three of them to be to together in public and because of this; they were unable to stand next to their son as the love of his live was slowly being lowered into the ground. Like always, the decoy parents assigned by SHIELD took their place.

Steve had to hold Tony in place when a distraught Mrs. Stacey blamed Gwen's death on Peter. The woman had previously her husband and now was also burying her daughter—she wasn't in her right mind. Steve couldn't imagine how he would handle it if something had happened to Tony or Peter. When all of the mourners had dispersed, Peter had still remained, eyes fixed on the fresh pile of dirt.

"You know it's not your fault, right?" Steve had said, stopping his son on his way to his room. He embraced him.

Peter stood limply for a few moments before extracting himself from Steve's embrace and making his way back into his bedroom. Steve's heart had sunk at the sound of the door being shut behind him.

Taking this and the mirror smashing into account, Steve was taken aback when he entered the kitchen early the next morning and found Peter sitting at the kitchen table; eating a bowl of cereal. Steve proceeded with caution, busying himself with the coffee maker before sitting across from his son

"Hey", Steve offered.

"Hi." He responded back, eyes briefly glancing up.

"I was planning on making pancakes. Interested?"

"Sure."

"Coming right up, Sport." Steve happily chirped, moving to the stove. He was glad his back was turned so Peter couldn't see the grin on his face. This was a start.

It wasn't long until Tony—probably alerted by Jarvis of Peter's presence ; Tony usually refused to get out of bed before—joined them in the kitchen. If Steve closed his eyes, he could fool himself into believing that Peter was once again that small, skinny kid with the bright smile. Peter had always been a pensive child; content with playing by himself or quietly looking out the window. Despite all the little boy had gone through, he always managed a smile. A genuine ear to ear smile that made those big brown eyes of his sparkle and that never failed to melt Steve's heart. There was no doubt though that that smile had never been brighter since Gwen had stepped into his life, and since her death, that smile hadn't been back yet. This was a start, though.

"I'm not going back to school", Peter blurted halfway through breakfast.

"Of course not, I don't expect you to. It's perfectly okay to take off a semester or two, if you want." Tony said, taking another bite of his pancake.

"No. You don't understand", Peter said calmly. "I'm not going back, at all."

Steve and Tony froze—Tony mid- bite and Steve mid-swallow.

"What do you mean, you're not going back? Like…at all?" Tony asked.

"Not at all", Peter confirmed.

There was this all businessman air about Peter that had never been there before. The squirrely, nervous energy had been replaced with an icy stillness. There was something different about his eyes...

"And what will you do instead?" Steve asked.

"What I should have been preparing to do all along: train to one day take dads place as head of Stark Industries."

Peter had once made it very clear that he absolutely refused to take over Stark towers, which Tony had been more than happy to accept. He didn't want Peter going through the pressure Howard had made him go through-he wouldn't breed his son into being his clone. Tony had offered Peter a job at Stark Industries but never expected him to one day run it

"Wait a minute", Tony said, holding his hands up. "You're saying you want to take over Stark Industries? I thought you had implied somewhere along the lines that you'd rather drop dead." Tony said, eyeing him suspiciously.

"Things are different now." Peter stated. "I'm different."

"Where is this suddenly coming from?" Steve asked.

"We all need to grow up eventually." Peter said nonchalantly. "I need to be prepared. There's one other thing...I'm joining SHIELD; I spoke to Fury. I wouldn't be a part of The Avengers. They're keeping me in New York and will only call on me when they need me; I'll be working alone as a local field agent."

(Don't forget to comment!)


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